


Love: Epilogue

by bluegrass



Series: By the Second Meeting [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Death, Drabble, F/F, Sickness, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 19:35:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9673019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluegrass/pseuds/bluegrass
Summary: Tumblr Prompt about love. It seemed sweet then.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy.

_“True love cannot be found where it does not exist, nor can it be denied where it does.”_

_- **Torquato Tasso**_

****

My eyes were set upon your standing figure on a colourless autumn’s day. Clouds had taken the sky, leaving a startling ocean of dull greys. My sight felt dimmed by the lack of sun to illuminate the street you stood (A when we had a picnic not long ago). I was taken aback, in all honesty, you had the loveliest tint of crimson that stained your fleshy cheeks.

Bronze orbs met mine, but insecurity shifted your gaze past mine. It didn’t matter however, for you were the most beautiful being I’d laid eyes on. You held Mother Nature in half-lidded eyes, a spark of green that spun in between.

Parting lips, as pale as the beige wallpaper that decorate my room. Swiped with pink, I assumed you felt cold from the slight tremble on your upper lip. Was it tears that threatened to fall as you shivered uncontrollably in my presence? _Don’t_. Those precious gems that threaten to fall, deserve not to be collected by my own trembling fingers.

Your bundle of frizzled hair curled by the tips. It was unruly, not that I minded- not as much as you did. I knew because every morning I’d watch endearingly as you murmured beneath your breath, the pain of maintenance and how you wished to just cut it all off in one swift, precise movement. ‘Another day.’ You’d say. Yet never were those words acted upon; because the definite shades of dark chocolate curls reminded you of your deceased mother who’d stroke your untameable hair every night. Whispering broken promises of comfort as you slept.

It touched you, hadn’t it? Spoken to the very core of your beautiful and hopeful heart despite the wise and grounded mind you possessed. You told me how you knew, _‘Mum won't last long,'_ with a trembling sigh. ‘Nurses aren’t good secret keepers these days.’ Tone sombre, but steady. Teeth clattering, but grit still in mere seconds.

I was glad you hadn’t noticed the flare of violence that stormed throughout my being. You would’ve been upset if you did.

For you, my dearest, believe it when I say that I'd suppress even the most powerful urges if only to appease the serenity that would’ve been kept in your accepting gaze.

Your hands, I love. Your gentle touches, I’d adored and indulged. The first handshake you honoured me sent lightning in my veins. A memorable warmth that spread through the firm grip you purchased. Those very hands later inflicted the greatest pleasure upon my skin. Despite the scars that decorate your wrists and despite the rough callouses that grew on their delicate flesh.

Now those beloved hands were clenched into fists and gripped tightly on your sleeves. Nails biting in your skin. Pain spread through my chest like dull aches after a morning run too far. It hurt to see the beads of rubies seep down your palm. My expression must’ve given me away because you immediately unclenched those beautiful hands of yours; with equal hurt in your eyes.

It was… unexpected; to see. Your face was a shard of glass whose hurt mirrored a distorted version of mine. Was I happy to see you care? Or was I sad to see your tears fall so noticeably this time?

 _Ah,_ questions. So _many_ questions but equally little answers. And time.

Nevertheless, time continued to move slowly like the Ferris Wheel we took on our first date. I could go on for an eternity describing the same hands which clasped softly against mine. You had promised to never let me go as we rode those roller coasters you were terrified of and thought I wouldn’t notice. 

My love was the Bravest; she was the Strongest of them all. Braver still as she broke in suffocating sobs because she thought herself a coward. It was a painfully wrong claim; I still remember the foot that stepped forward to offer a war hero a flower for his services when others scorned the kills he’d made as sacrifice for his country and to his psychology.  

I Longed for you to see the best in yourself. And when you do, I’d be ecstatic to see your chin lift just a little bit higher.

I Love you, my most precious heart. I Adore you, the lioness of my life. And I am so, so sorry to leave you. Always sorry to be unable to shield you from the demons that keep you awake at night from this moment forth. And from the various darkness that dwell within humanity before you could even face first the voices that spoke to you in haunting tones.

Lying on the soft hospital bed, the scent of medicine and death must’ve torture your nose, right? I know you never liked the scent. It’s terrible, I agree. Even worse still the tasteless walls with the lack of portraits in decoration. Your fond admiration for art always appealed to me. It was adorable, when you blushed warmly from the excitement that showcased itself when I bought that ticket to the art museum you always wished to visit on the 13th of February: the day you were gifted to this world.

 _Embrace me,_ love. It might help the discomfort despite the thin layer of clothes that may keep us apart and the undelightful smell that wafts off me equally heavy as the hospital room. You smile so enchantingly as you brought me into your arms protectively. With fingers clenched at the fabric of my clothes so tightly it might as well rip. I for one, couldn't bear to leave and have you upset.

But know that I am equally sad, Dearest. Sorrowful to love one so wonderful such as you and not be able to live through to it to the very end. Know that despite the Death that claims me, I’d take a hundred more alongside myself to burn; only to see the light of flames reflect upon your most hypnotic eyes.  

 _Do kiss_. Feel the familiar soft press of cracked lips and taste the last I'll ever give. 

Also answer the only question I am able:  _“Have you loved me?"_  .

For I have never heard the words leave your lips. But never rush; your warm sighs and liquid diamonds said everything your silence hadn’t.


End file.
